Funny Thoughts for Today – “A Few Cocktails and a Box of Crayons”
“If you want an interesting party sometime, combine a few cocktails and a box of crayons.” (Robert Fulghum)
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“Everyone, at some point in their lives, wakes up in the middle of the night with the feeling that they are all alone in the world, and that nobody loves them now and that nobody will ever love them, and that they will never have a decent night’s sleep again and will spend their lives wandering blearily around a loveless landscape, hoping desperately that their circumstances will improve, but suspecting, in their heart of hearts, that they will remain unloved forever.
The best thing to do in these circumstances is to wake somebody else, so that they can feel this way, too.” (Lemony Snicket)
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“Next time my analyst says, ‘If you’re unhappy, whose fault do you suppose that is?’ — I got a list of names in my hip pocket.” (Robert Brault)
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“’You’re judged by the company you keep,’ said my father. ‘Your father hangs out with jackasses and drunks,’ said my mother.” (Author Unknown)
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“’He was his own best friend – always alone, but never lonely,’ said a sad widow of her dead ex-husband at his memorial service. ‘But I always thought when he was alone he was in bad company.’” (Anonymous)
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“God writes a lot of comedy … the trouble is, he’s stuck with so many bad actors who don’t know how to play funny.” (Garrison Keillor)
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“Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.” (Victor Borge)
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“You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.” (Mae West)
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Catalyst Quotes 